By Ifeoluwa Adeolu
Several years ago in 1980, even before I was born, my father wrote a book…”Pause to think”. Recently I’ve been thinking about the choices and decisions we make as individuals, as parents, as friends, as lovers, partners or whoever we chose to be in the moment. Do we pause for a moment and think before getting angry, making decisions or just simply making promises?
I’ll admit one of my worries in my younger adult life was kind of ridiculous. Don’t laugh, but my fear was of the unknown, I used to fear being alone like what would happen to me, would I someday have a house accident and no one would care to look for me, and I would have decayed by the time people realize I’m missing, My cat would have eaten half of my face like Ramsey Bolton’s hounds went for his face in Game Of Thrones.
Not that I feared the help or the friendly visit. Rather, I was worried I wouldn’t be prepared. I was afraid of not being prepared… of not being ready. I wanted to have at least a moment’s notice to clear the clutter and put my lipstick on before I had to swing open the door.
As a young newlywed some years back my fear changed, I was no longer afraid of my face been eaten by a randy cat but I was more afraid of being broke, of having no money, that scared the shit out of me BUT as I matured daily and grew much more wiser, I remembered the words of my mother, her stressing that the important things in life are what makes you rich and so the things that seemed big gradually started to look small Gradually I was learning to let go of things that added unnecessary stress or chaos in my life and home. I got serious about clearing out the stuff that overwhelmed me: the busyness, the hurry, distractions or idleness, disorganization, perfectionism or any other roadblocks to peace. I started thinking positively; before I made a decision…I paused to think!
I will probably teach my son that the secret to great wisdom, is to follow all men with peace and owe no man nothing, to fear nothing and never take anything he has gotten for granted, even the minutest things come in our lives for a reason, somehow the riddle of life might be understood or misunderstood but he must know that life is meant to be enjoyed, but our actions either make or mar us, hence to live well he must always pause to think before taking any actions, and in doing so, he will and always do the right things.
We have to play out our lives every day, our actions, tempers, the things and people we take for granted, even in love and relationships, we shouldn’t be rigid and so greedy, we must ponder thoughtfully on the decisions that we make.
I learn everyday now that I will pause to think before taking actions, I learn every second now to find more peace when I let go of the clutter and focus on the joy of the life and home God gave me and I just enjoy everything God has given me to make my life so beautiful.