It was like seeing Austin had started out my week on a bad note because I couldn’t seem to find any happiness the rest of that week.
When I was in the classroom with the kids, I couldn’t concentrate because thoughts of what he could possibly know about Abel kept dancing across my mind.
How long had he known?
Had it just been the party or was there something more? Perhaps he had suspected something while we were still together…
I didn’t know why it mattered to me anymore but somehow I couldn’t help obsessing.
Austin had been my everything at a point in my life, then he had disappeared. And now he had reappeared like mist on an early morning, disrupting the life I had so carefully constructed without him.
Who was I kidding? Like Ronke had said when I related the day’s incident to her, I wasn’t totally over him.
‘I mean why would you even let him buy you lunch!’ she yelled.
‘I didn’t know he was going to,’ I protested weakly.
‘Or maybe you subconsciously wanted him to. You need to decide what you want Kehinde,’ she said, using my full name which made me know she was upset. ‘You can’t keep going back and forth. Are you moving on are you hanging back waiting for him to get back with you? If you can’t decide this, then you’re going to keep hurting yourself. I mean, who cares if he knows you kissed Abel or spent the night with him for that matter? He walked out on you, remember? You owe him nada! Get that through your head!’
Her words had been ringing in my head all week. So much truth in what she was saying but if only it was that easy. Why couldn’t someone just pluck a memory out of their minds and delete it forever? Pretend it never happened?
Maybe if I could do that, I would get Austin out of my system.
It was these thoughts that were going through my head when my sister called me.
As I saw her ID on the screen of my phone, I smiled. Twin telepathy? How did she know I desperately needed to talk to her?
‘Hi twinny,’ her voice sounded breezy and without worries. I envied her.
‘Hey you, whatsup?’
‘I was thinking today and realized we hadn’t spoken since the birthday thingy, what’s popping with you na?’
‘Er…my life is ever dramatic jare. You won’t believe it.’
‘Hmmm. I thought as much. What’s been on your mind? Wanna share?’
‘Not now. I’m still at work. It’s break time. Maybe we can talk later.’
‘Oh. Well, I was going to suggest something to you. Let’s go and visit Mummy and Daddy this weekend na. It’s been a while.’
I sighed. Perhaps she was right, I needed a semi-change of scenery to get my thoughts together.
Even though my parents lived in Lagos too, it was like they lived in another state because we lived in different parts of Lagos and the heavy Lagos traffic was our constant enemy.
‘So what do you think?’ she probed.
‘Okay. I’ll come. Tomorrow is Friday, should we go tomorrow or Saturday?’
‘I was thinking tomorrow. So we can leave Saturday evening. I need to be in church on Sunday.’
‘Okay, boss. Your wish is my command.’
She chuckled at the other end of the line.
‘Funny girl. See you tomorrow, okay? And be fine. Don’t think yeye thoughts o. We’ll talk when we see.’
‘Yes ma’am. Gotta go now o. Bye.’
‘Bye.’ she hung up.
And suddenly I felt lighter. I was going to see my twin soon and hopefully she’d have a great solution for me.
‘Okay kids, break time is over. To your seats now!’ I rapped against the table.