The Single Girl Diary (Part Twenty Three)

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There was a restaurant close to my place of work; a private affair with mauve curtains and cold air blasting from the A.C.

I shivered as we entered, not from the cold but from anticipation and trepidation about what awaited me inside. I was about to sit down and have a conversation with my ex-fiance! What would Ronke say if she knew? She definitely will not approve. She was all for leaving the past in the past and moving on.

And so was I, or so I thought.

What if Austin was here to ask to have me back?

What would be my response?

Did I still ache for him?

My heart definitely still missed him.

‘Kay- Kay?’ His voice roused me from my thoughts.

‘Mmm?’ I looked up to see he’d pulled out a seat for me and I’d been staring at it without realizing why.

‘Oh,’ I sat. ‘Thank you.’

I watched him sit opposite me and I couldn’t help remembering the many times we’d sat together like this, laughing or whispering, conspirational. Two lovers and partners-in-crime, enjoying their company. A sadness not foreign to me, coursed through my body, bursting out in a sorrowful sigh from my mouth.

I missed those days. When I could talk to him, tell him anything and everything. Cry when I hurt, God, we were great together!

‘…Kay?’

Again I was roused, I blinked, looking away from him.

‘I asked what you would drink,’ he said.

‘Nothing. Just…water.’ I realized I might need water in the course of our discussion.

While he signalled the waiter, I stared at him.

How long had it taken me to memorize every inch of his face? The outline of his profile. I knew where his birth marks were; behind his right ear, somewhere down his neck and the pretties one just above his eyebrow. I’d loved playing with that one when we were together. I still remembered the scar that ran down his thighs, the one he’d gotten from an accident a while ago.

He was wearing a blue shirt, unbuttoned at the neck to reveal the top of his white singlet. I used to love it when he did that. I would run my finger around his throat in circles, then kiss it.

Stop it now, Kehinde!

I admonished myself.

It’s been more than a year. He’s no longer yours!

‘So, what did you want to talk to me about?’ I asked, rearranging my thoughts.

‘Let’s eat first, then we talk.’ he said, firmly.

‘Eat? I thought it was just talk.’

‘Well, I ordered your favorite. ‘ the look on his face was the kind that sought for approval.

‘You did what?’ I asked, eyes wide. ‘I didn’t say I wanted to eat. And you had no right to order without asking me!’

‘Well, you used to like it when I did it. And I know your favorite food, remember?’ his attempt at a wink was poor.

‘Are you for real right now?! You waltz into my school demanding to speak to me after disappearing off the face of the earth for a year plus. And you think ordering my favorite meal would get you off the hook? You gotta be kidding me!’

I was furious now.

‘Let it out, Kay-Kay, let it all out.’ he said, calm as can be and I felt like hitting him.

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