These are challenging times for most people I know and in a similar age bracket. I am 52 years old and very worried at the way innovations and automations are taking up the jobs in the employment space. You can self-check in at the airport without the need for an attendant. You can pay for your groceries at a store without the help of an assistant. The list goes on. I am not in a skilled job and I worry constantly about what the future will hold if I lose my job. In all honesty, I don’t think I can learn new skills to help me get another job at my age should I be made redundant. I worry so much about the future that it’s keeping me from enjoying the present. How can I stop worrying like this so I can enjoy the now? Dorothy, kindly advise.
One of the ways to stop worrying oneself silly is to adopt the mantra – “Que sera, sera. Whatever will be will be”. It is from a song by actress/singer Doris Day – “Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be, Will Be)”
The first two verses go thus:
When I was just a little girl
I asked my mother, What will I be?
Will I be pretty? Will I be rich?
Here’s what she said to me:
Que sera, sera
Whatever will be, will be
The future’s not ours to see
Que sera, sera
What will be, will be
My dear, we all will do well to keep ourselves from worrying because in life, whatever will be, will be. I don’t know if you are religious, but in one of his sermons in the New Testament of the Bible, Jesus buttresses this point in Luke 12:25 (NIV) – “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?”
And he goes on to say further in Luke 12:26-31 – “Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labour or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendour was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith! And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.
Worry is not the answer!
A dear friend of mine was going through a very rough patch in life a few years ago. In fact, everything was in sixes and sevens as far as her life was concerned – undergoing an emotional breakdown after being laid off from work, problems with keeping up with the rent for her flat, recently divorced, everything spiralling out of control and not a ray of hope or silver lining in site. One day, as she was drifting off to sleep, full of worries and trepidation, she recalled the verses from Luke 12 above from her childhood and decided to let go and let God. She decided to quit worrying as this had paid no dividend whatsoever and rendered her incapable of taking positive actions to remedy her situation.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him and he will make your paths straight.” – Proverbs 3:5-6
So my dear, reach out and seek for solutions, for the person who seeks, really finds. Worrying is not the answer. It’s never too late to start. Focus on the positive – In life, truth be told, “Our worst misfortunes never happen, and most miseries lie in anticipation.” – Honoré de Balzac